I ran my first 5K!
I finished with a time of 38:47 and sixth overall in my division...the 50-59 females!
Ugh! I still can't believe that I am 50 years old.
Not really sure how I got here or how I survived passed my early 20's.
I was so stupid, headstrong, and willful. I knew everything and you couldn't tell me a thing.
In short, I was pretty much a jerk.
Then I stopped drinking became well, a sober, stupid, headstrong, willful, know-it-all!
It's taken many years of trials and tribulations and failures to get to where I am today.
I am smarter but still headstrong although much less stubborn and I know that I don't know much but I can learn anything as long as I am willing to admit what I don't know.
Most importantly, I am a mom.
I am a mom of twin four-year-old boys who are learning to be independent, but can be headstrong, defiant and willful.
Just like...well, me.
In fact, the twins turned four today.
|The boys' T-Rex birthday cake|
I find myself asking that question each year as time flies by in what appears to be a blur.
Another mom reminded me of a great expression yesterday, "The days are long but the years are short."
How true it is.
Yesterday wasn't just long, it was hellaciously long.
The kids were whiny and cranky all day. I'm reasonably sure it was the stupid time change from daylight savings.
David was the worst. We endured a 20 minute fit over my putting his sippy cup in the diaper bag, something I've been doing for four years (I use it for sippy cups and food now). Evidently, he wanted to carry it. So I took it out of said bag and put it on the counter so that he could carry it and the tantrum got worse because he wanted to take it out of the bag, something he's never done.
It was hell.
No amount of distraction tactics would work to calm him or divert his attention to something else. He was just determined to scream.
I managed to get him in the car but then actually had to turn around and go back to the house and sit in the driveway with the threat of shutting off the car and going inside to get him to stop.
I was fully prepared to do this but I didn't really want to.
They are learning that mommy doesn't make empty threats. But that doesn't stop them from pushing the limits!
I follow through. It's tough and really, really difficult at times, but I feel it's important for teaching them where the boundaries are, how to follow instructions and to play by the rules!
It doesn't mean that they are not headstrong or defiant at times, yesterday being one of them, but they are learning when to push and when not to.
Sometimes my refusals are based on my fears not their abilities. It's tough to remember that when I'm frustrated.
|The boys making silly faces|
They try so hard to be independent but still need me to zip their jackets, tie their shoes and wipe their butts.
Independence will come but it will take time.
They are only four and I am not in a rush for them to grow up.
Although having them wipe their own butts would be nice.
I love being a mom. The boys complete me in ways I never knew I was deficient. I had to become a mom to truly understand my shortcomings and know love.