The Signing

After the seizure I saw a neurologist who signed off on my paperwork stating that I was ok to drive. Did you know that if you have a seizure you have to have papers signed? Yeah, me either but I did and he did so all is good.

Mostly...

As I mentioned in my previous post, Wellbutrin can cause seizures. According to the FDA: "Bupropion is associated with seizures in approximately 0.4% (4/1,000) of patients treated at doses up to 450 mg/day. This incidence of seizures may exceed that of other marketed antidepressants by as much as 4-fold."

When I mentioned this to the doctor he got that glazed over look that I used to give people when they'd say, "You're from NJ do you know my cousin Richard?" Um....

Anyway, I went on to explain that Glaxosmithkline paid the government $3.4 billion for fraud and false promotion of Wellbutrin and about six other medications. The settlement was explained on July 2, 2012 in The New York Times: "In the largest settlement involving a pharmaceutical company, the British drugmaker GlaxoSmithKline agreed to plead guilty to criminal charges and pay $3 billion in fines for promoting its best-selling antidepressants for unapproved uses and failing to report safety data about a top diabetes drug, federal prosecutors announced Monday. The agreement also includes civil penalties for improper marketing of a half-dozen other drugs."

"If GSK (as they are now known) is willing to lie about it's uses are they willing to lie about their frequency of the side-effects?" I asked. The glazed look vanished and the doctor's eyebrows shot up to his scalp. Despite still wearing a mask it was obvious that I'd made him think.

He signed my papers :)

He did ask me to follow up with an EEG to make sure that everything was firing properly but that wouldn't happen for a few months. Guess it wasn't an emergency huh?! 

Stopping the Wellbutrin proved to be an depressing nightmare! My Seasonal Affective Disorder was pretty bad and I was suffering. I told my mom what was going on and she called her chiropractor

It's a non-invasive test that measures electrical activity in your brain.

The test lasts about an hour. It's in the dark with eyes closed...I fell asleep.

The tech and I were laughing about how often you get to go to a medical appointment and get to nap!

The worst part is the goo they use as a conductor between the electrode and the scalp. I couldn't wait to get home and wash my hair!

The results came back clear and confirmed that I do have a brain. 

This spring has been a whirlwind of activity in general.

Between bridal shows and open houses I have been crazy busy. The month of May has been torturously busy with the weekend of May 19, being the busiest ever. Three weddings, an open house, a birthday and a piano dedication.

I got it all done with lots of coffee and help from some friends!

Between the neurologist appointment and the EEG I also finished the tattoo.

IT HURT LIKE HELL!!!

It really did.

Not where my boobs used to be but down the center on my sternum. Holy heck was it painful.

I used some of the leftover lidocain cream that I had from my port to numb the area. It gave me a solid hour of relief while my the artist worked but at the end it was really, really tough!

I had the incredible opportunity to create a super cool cake for Cheval, who designed my tattoo. It was going to be the first time we were together since the tattoo was finished and I was so excited!

The bridal shop where we met installed a pop-up shoe shop and Cheval was going to be there for the launch.

The cake was a hit but her reaction to it was everything! 

She truly is the nicest person on the face of the earth.

I loved that I was able to show her the finished work and have her sign it! I will be adding it to the tattoo as soon as I can get in for an appoinment.

I had to miss my last appointment with my oncologist because I woke up feeling really nauseous. 

I'm really bummed too because it was supposed to be on Cinco de Mayo! I was all prepared. 

I see her the end of this month and need to come up with something fun. 

The boys' last day of school is six days away and I can't wait! Looking forward to swimming and daytime excursions with them. 

That's about all for now. 

Stay well my friends. 

. 

Rewrite The Scars

My friend is a girl you might know. 

At one time in her life she was a world renowned wedding dress designer who was featured on Say Yes To The Dress.

I was invited to provide a cake for a "Meet the Designer Trunk Show" at a bridal salon in Delaware. 

That's how we met. 

She looked at the cake I'd created for the event and said she felt like she could create a dress based on the cake. 

I wanted to jump out of my skin with excitement. 

I was so nervous and she was so gracious.  

I was immediately taken by her genuine authenticity. 

Seriously, she may be one of the nicest people on the face of the earth. 

After that event we stayed in touch and I did another event with her the following year. 

A little back story here: Nearly 15 years ago this amazing woman signed a contract with a wedding dress design house that gave her her own named dress line! 

It was a dream come true for any designer. 

Because she is a glass half-full type of person, was so excited and flattered that it never crossed her mind that someone would do something that would cause her harm and did not have a lawyer review the contract before she signing.

When she asked questions, they said she could renegotiate any potential issues. 

Well, that turned out to not be true. 

Not only did they not allow her to renegotiate the contract but they stopped paying her, took her social media accounts, any sketches of any type of dresses and they took her name. 

Yes, you read that correctly, she is no longer allowed to use her birth name. 

Evidently it was written into the contract that she signed. Yes, she signed it but, in my opinion, there is a special place in hell for businesses and owners who operate so unethically. They knew what they were doing when they put that in there in the first place! 

Anyway, fast forward a few years, many thousands of dollars and many court battles later...She still cannot use her name, she is barred from working in the wedding industry for five years because of the non-compete clause but she did get her pictures back from her social media accounts. 

And... she has a new name. 

She is Cheval. 

She is powerful, strong, kind, loving, sweet, wonderful, smart, funny and a genuinely good person. 

She is also now a shoe designer! 

I know, right?! 

Her shoes are amazing! Not only are they beautiful but I wore a pair, right out of the box, for her launch party and they were stupid comfortable! 

Once I decided to forego reconstruction after my  double mastectomy I made the decision to get a tattoo. 

She is Cheval

I reached out to Cheval to see if she'd be interested in designing it for me. The only thing I told her was that  it had to have a pink ribbon in it and I wanted florals.

She did the rest. 

The design is amazing! It needed a very minor amount of tweaking to make it perfect. I was so excited when I got the first drawing that booked the appointment months ago. 

Today I had my first sitting. 

Some parts hurt like a mother f$cker and some I didn't even feel. 

When they cut off the boobs I lost a lot of sensation in those areas of my chest but the center was crazy painful. 

Getting the color done will hurt too but..

It's already worth it. 

Once my tattoo artist, Aly was finished and I looked in the mirror I almost cried. 

For almost a year and a half all I've seen was scars. 

Today I saw beauty. 

A beautiful design created by one of the most beautiful and resilient poeple I have met in my life. 

I am blessed to call her friend and honored to wear her art. 

                                                You can follow She is Cheval on Instagram