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If you have kids under 15 you are most likely familiar with YouTubers.

Specifically, gamers.  

The boys are obsessed with watching other people play video games. These gamers may be most annoying people on the face of the earth. Their over the top drama used to hype up Minecraft is the stuff that creates migraines. 

But...While on YouTube they discovered Mark Rober. 

THE Mark Rober of glitterbomb fame. 

According to the profile on Wikipedia, "Mark B. Rober is an American YouTuber, engineer, and inventor. He is known for his YouTube videos on popular science and do-it-yourself gadgets. Before YouTube, Rober was an engineer with NASA for 9 years where he spent seven of those years working on the Curiosity rover at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory."

Rober only makes one video a month but the boys had not watched him before so we binge watched everything that he had created to date. 

If you have kids who says they hate science, you need to have them watch this guy. He is amazing! 

Warning: Be prepared to do some serious experiments once they are inspired! 

One of the videos he created was  Glitterbomb Trap Catches Phone Scammer (who gets arrested)

Scamming is a numbers game. They send out thousands of emails or phone calls and get a handful of responses that can earn them hundreds or thousands of dollars. We've all received the irritating phone calls and emails. Most of us ignore them but, once in a while the scammers get someone on the phone and get them talking. They convince them that they will be sending a refund and then walk them through a number of steps that ultimately gives the scammer access to the person's personal information. 

Scamming is a $20 billion industry. Scammers are warehoused in packed call centers who use scare tactics and threats to extract thousands of dollars from unsuspecting people. 

They are smart, unscrupulous and corrupt. 

They don't care if they are taking a person's last dollar. They care about making money. 

We all think that "people should know better" and we should but they are crafty. 

One of the people who assisted Mark Rober was YouTuber Scammer Payback. While I was recovering from my mastectomy I spent lots of time watching his videos. 

I'll never have the mental capacity for programming but I am very grateful for guys like this who can expose these scammers and send the authorities to their door! 

Today I received an email stating that my annual subscription to Norton Antivirus was being automatically renewed through Amazon. The email stated that if I had questions or concerns I could call the number provided in the email. 

I don't have Norton. In fact, I haven't had Norton in years. And even when I did have Norton, I purchased it through Norton not Amazon.

But just to be sure I hadn't accidentally purchased it in the past, I double checked my order history. 

Nope. No Norton. 

Because I had watched the videos I knew it was the Amazon scam described in the videos but I called anyway. 

They said all the things that Rober and Scammer Payback said they would. 

When I said that I didn't want the renewal they said they could do a refund as long as I had a computer. 

I replied with, "Is this the part where you get access to my computer and get me to sign into my bank?"

He replied, "Oh no. We send you a form to complete." 

I said, "No, no you won't. I don't know how you can sleep at night knowing that you are ripping people off!"

They don't actually take the money, nor do they actually provide a refund but they make it look like they do. Then they get the victim to send them gift cards, money orders and even cash packed with coffee grounds or wrapped in foil! 

They gift cards and cash can't be traced and coffee grounds and foil keep it from being detected by security dogs. 

The lengths they go to is amazing and they are astoundingly successful! 

Scamming is a $20 billion industry. It most likely will not stop any time soon. 

Educating yourself about how they work is the best way to keep them from working on you or your loved ones. 

Huge thanks to Mark Rober and Scammer Payback AKA Pierogi for your work. You saved me lots of money! 

Make sure to click the links and watch the videos! 

A Fighting Chance

My niece got married last weekend. She was supposed to have gotten married in 2020 but the world shut down on their original wedding date!  

Two reschedules later, they are finally husband and wife! 

It was an unbelievable wedding with lots of laughs, a few tears, great speeches and...

I danced!!!

It's been ages since I danced. 

Like, REALLY danced. 

I led a freaking conga line through a ballroom! 

My feet still hurt and so does my chest (a little) but...

I. Don't. Care!!! 

Chemo looms on my horizon. 

I overdid it knowing that it was going to be my last opportunity to do so for a while. 

Unfortunatley, I spent Sunday in bed because the armpit where they removed the nodes hurt like hell. 

The worst part was that we had to postpone our Father's Day canoe trip. Canoe trips are a family favorite and I was really looking forward to it. But, between the pain and not getting any sleep because of the pain it was just not a good idea. 

Fortunately, I am the type of person who does actually listen to my body and backs off when things get rough. 

I didn't used to be that person. 

I have overdone it physically many, many times in my life and have the knees, ankles and arthritis to prove it. 

But I have matured, well, actually my body has matured and no longer allows me to be a dumbass who doesn't know when to stop. 

However, this does not matter to some people who feel it necessary to give me useless advice. 

If one more person tells me to take care of myself I may throat punch them. 

Aaaaaaaaaaaaargh!!!! 

Yes, I know it's important. 

I'm not a moron. 

I'm also a business owner, business partner, boss, manager, marketing director, mom, wife, homeowner, chief cook and bottle washer. 

The hats I wear are many. 

Self-care is a hot cup of coffee and a game of on-line cribbage. 

While people mean well, they need to respect where a person is in their life. Unsolicited advice right now is rarely welcome. 

I appreciate the people who ask if I need help, not the people who tell me I should get some.

Don't tell me to relax, breathe or calm down. 

When I am wound up and having a crappy day I need people who can commiserate or just listen. Having someone say, "I have no idea how you feel but I'm here if you need to vent" means the world to me. 

I appreciate their honesty and their willingness to be with me in the moment. 

They don't offer advice, tell me how to feel or try to fix anything. They just listen! 

Speaking of fixing things...

The engine in the 2017 Ford escape has been replaced. Ford covered most of the parts. While we are very grateful to Ford for their assistance, we still should not have had to replace an engine at 84,400 miles! 

It runs well and everything is good except the passenger side windshield wiper now hits the "A" pillar and makes a tapping sound every time it swipes. 

So annoying! 

I only noticed because, after going through the carwash and cleaning the inside of the car for two hours, it rained. 

Never fails! 

Today I had an echocardiogram and had more lab work done. I'll be happy when the port is installed and I can stop being a pin cushion! 

The port will be installed on Thursday morning. Chemo starts Friday and will be every week for 12 weeks. 

Reactions to the drugs are an unknown as I fortunately, have never had them before. 

The unknowns bother me more than anything else. 

I might be sick, but I might not. 

I might lose my hair, but I might not. 

I might have neuropathy, but I might not. 

I try to not spend a lot of time thinking about that stuff. 

It's a massive rabbit hole of "what ifs" that I don't want to go down. Instead, I choose to bury myself in the technical stuff. 

I like to understand the treatments and the research/reasoning behind them. 

I will be receiving Taxol and Herceptin. 

"Taxol, originally extracted from the bark of the Pacific yew tree, is one of the mostly commonly used drugs against solid tumors, and is a front-line drug for treating ovarian and advanced breast cancer. The drug is known to bind to microtubules and essentially freeze them in place, which prevents them from separating the chromosomes when a cell divides. This kills dividing cells, in particular cancer cells, which are known for rapid proliferation." Berkeley News

"Herceptin works by attaching itself to the HER2 receptors on the surface of breast cancer cells and blocking them from receiving growth signals. By blocking the signals, Herceptin can slow or stop the growth of the breast cancer. Herceptin is an example of an immune targeted therapy. In addition to blocking HER2 receptors, Herceptin can also help fight breast cancer by alerting the immune system to destroy cancer cells onto which it is attached." Breastcancer.org

Although they do not know which side effect I will succumb to, they do know that these two drugs can give me many, many more years to come. 

According to the National Cancer Institute, $590 million dollars is invested in breast cancer research annually. 

I am am grateful for each an everyone of those dollars for myself, my sister, my mother, my aunt, countless friends and any other woman who will hear that they have breast cancer. 

Because of the preventative/diagnostic measures that have come from that reseach, we have a fighting chance today. 

While it is not a sorority I ever wanted to pledge, I am proud to be a pink ribbon sister with some of the most amazing warriors on the planet. 

But Wait There's More!

As if breast cancer and a new HVAC system weren't enough, our car died. 

Our 2017 Ford Escape died. 

Yes, you read that correctly. 

Making matters even worse, our extended warranty was good for 6 years or 75,000 miles and we have 84,491 miles on it. So while we were below on time we were over on miles. 

I called Ford and begged, groveled and cried. 

It worked. 

We are waiting for the final details but it looks like Ford will pay for the parts and we will have to pay for the labor. 

So if anyone has a spare $3K they're willing to part with...

From what the Service Manager at the dealership told me, this is more than he's seen Ford pay for anything in quite some time. 

For that I am grateful but again, the vehicle only has 84,491 miles. It shouldn't need an engine.

We have 17 payments left and will have to drive this thing into the ground to get our money out of it. 

We just can't catch a break! 

After my diagnosis of breast cancer I made the decision to be very open about the cancer, surgery, treatment, etc. specifically because I wanted to help educate people. My hope was that sharing my experience would encourage others to have their mammograms and maybe I could help save a life. 

Never, in a million years, did I imagine the life I would be saving was my little sister! 

Yup, you read that correctly too! 

After having cancer hit so close to home (and being harranged by our mom), my sister finally made it in for a mammogram. 

The call came in about two days later that she needed to go in for a follow up. 

When she called I wasn't worried. Both my mom and and I had to go back for additional mammograms that each turned out to be nothing. 

It wasn't nothing. 

There is a tumor. 

She has since had a biopsy and all we know at this point is that she has cancer and that the tumor is Invasive Ductal Carcinoma...sound familiar? 

Yes, that's what mine was too. 

Hopefully when she sees her surgeon later this week she'll get more information about hormone receptors and we are praying that she is Her2 negative. 

She has gone for genetic testing and I have a swab kit being sent to my house to have my testing done too. 

We are currently encouraging all family members to be tested. In fact, I'd love to find a genetic researcher to catalog the whole family! 

I have also discovered that John's Hopkins still has tissue samples from my father's autopsy in 2010. We are now looking into having one of those samples tested for known genetic cancer markers. 

Although my mom was negative for the BRCA1/2 genes it could be present in my dad's side of the family. It doesn't matter whether the gene comes from the maternal or paternal side. If a woman tests positive for the BRCA gene there is a greater than 70% chance they will develop breast cancer. 

But wait there's more! 

Did you know that men can test positive too?

A man with BRCA2 is not only at risk for developing breast cancer but has an increased risk of developing prostate cancer as well. 

"Men who carry a BRCA2 gene alteration have a higher lifetime risk of developing prostate cancer. 1 in 4 - 1 in 5 (20-25%) of men who carry BRCA2 develop prostate cancer at some point. Most of these prostate cancers occur over the age of 45. Men who carry a BRCA2 alteration also have a higher chance of getting breast cancer. The chance of this is about 1 in 14 (7%)." (West Midlands Regional Genetic Department. Dorothy Halliday, Consultant in Cancer Genetics Version 1, November 2011, Review, November 2014, Oxford University Hospitals NHS Trust , Oxford OX3 9DU)

So guys...If there is a high incidence of breast cancer or prostate cancer in either side of you parent's families you need to contact a genetic counselor. If you don't know if there is a history of cancer in your family, start asking questions and create a family tree.  

According to the American Cancer Society Breast cancer is the second leading cause of cancer death in women. (Only lung cancer kills more women each year.) The chance that a woman will die from breast cancer is about 1 in 39 (about 2.6%). Unfortunately, breast cancer incidents continue to rise by .5% annually and 85% of those have no family history of breast cancer. 

It can happen to anyone! 

They are still discovering causes and treatments. If caught early enough the 5-year survival rate is greater than 90%. 

I can't emphasize early intervention enough. Do you weekly self breast exam. Pick a day of the week and do it religiously. Pick a style of exam and stick with it. That way you can detect an abnormality right away! 

If you're due for the mammogram, make the appointment. 

It may save your life! 

You Can't Make This Up

While I would be bored to death in a life that was the same day after day, life has been so much more stressful the past two months than I could ever have imagined. 

The roller coaster of life has been relentless.

Don’t get me wrong, this adrenaline junkie does love a good coaster but this one has been hell.


It feels like we’re stuck in an endless loop-de-loop and the damn thing wont stop!

Eleven days before double mastectomy surgery, after enduring countless tests and an additional bone cancer scare, the central AC in the house died. I have been paying a company called American Home Shield for a home warranty since we bought the house in 2011 specifically to protect us when the HVAC died.

I filed a claim and American Home Shield sent some half-assed contractor who was super nice when he thought we were going to upgrade both the AC and Furnace with him (they were 21 years old...it was time) but when I tried to get him to get partial compensation through the warranty company, he ghosted us.

In fact, he ghosted American Home Shield…but they don’t care.

I did some research and discovered that is his normal MO. He has a one-star rating with BBB and that star is because you can't give zero.

I called American Home Shield every day trying to get this rectified because I was facing a double mastectomy and returning home to a house with no AC. And, both the contractor and American Home Shield knew about my impending surgery!

American Home Shield informed me that they would pay to replace the compressor but that the freon was going to cost $1,400. We had a lengthy discussion about the fact that the system was 21 years old and once they replaced the compressor something else would fail that’s what happens with old equipment! Never mind the fact that I didn't want to pay $1,400 for freon. If we were going to pay that much money it was going toward a new system.

American Home Shield called Tom at Climate Control Heating & Air, LLC multiple times and left messages asking him to call. He didn't.

After a full week of daily calls to both American Home Shield and Climate Control Heating & Air LLC I was informed that the contractor had ordered the compressor without ever speaking to us.

WTF?!

I lost my shit!!!

We never authorized the repair and that guy never bothered to speak to us.

I did get one email from him yelling at me in all CAPS that said if he changed his recommendation, they’d send someone for a second opinion. I told him I didn’t care.

He disappeared again.

In the meantime, we had contacted a friend of a friend who is starting his own HVAC business. James gave us an amazing deal on a both a central AC and new furnace.

Damn good thing too.

Evidently the heat exchange was full of cracks. Had we fired it up this fall the whole family may have died.

I had surgery on May 17.

While I was in the hospital hubby went to Home Depot and bought a window air conditioner so I could come home and recuperate in comfort.

Think about this… in addition to the thousands of dollars that I have wasted with American Home Shield we are now out $8,400 for a new HVAC system plus the cost of a window air conditioner.

American Home Shield, after being shamed on Facebook, has paid us $797 that was supposed to cover the Compressor and labor - don't forget that we were going to have to pay $1400 for freon - so that measly $797 was truly a drop in the pond.

Unbelievably, the Friday after surgery, Tom from Climate Control Heating & Air LLC called. My only comment was that I didn't want to speak to him, and I hung up.

I could have let loose on the jerk, but what would be the point? It's not like he gave a crap to begin with!

James arrived the next morning and got the new system installed. By dinner time that night we were back in whole house comfort! We are so grateful to him for rearranging his schedule to help us.

There are reputable home warranty companies out there. American Home Shield is not one of them. If you are thinking about a home warranty do your research so you don’t waste your money like we did.

If you need a new HVAC system, let me know…I gotta guy! 

Robotic Box Checker

I thought I was going to get my drains out last week.

I was wrong. 

Unbeknownst to me, the total drainage per side needs to be below 30 cc per day for two days consecutively. Not knowing this, I arrived at the surgeon's office only to be informed, rather snippily by the nurse, that I was not going to be having them removed that day, the next day or probably not until the following week.

When I questioned why she said that I was draining more than 30cc's for the day. When I replied that I didn't know that she said, "I asked you when you called this morning." 

Technically she did. However, she did not ask, "Are you under 30cc's for the day?" What she asked was, "Are you under 30cc's?" I replied that when I emptied the drain that morning it was less than 20cc's. 

She got nippy. I got snippy right back and said, "You'll have to excuse me. This is the first time I've had my boobs cut off so I have no idea how things are supposed to work."

Then I had a massive meltdown... and the nurse got a lot nicer.

But, I still spent the day in bed crying. I was devastated. 

The drains hurt. 

I mentioned previously that the drain on the right was killing me. It was super painful and as it healed it got worse. Add suction pain to the drain pain and I was completely miserable. Seriously, it felt like my skin was being sucked into my chest. 

Sleeping has been nearly impossible which has contributed to my deteriorating emotional state and increased depression. Two antidepressants a day did little to help me. 

Don't get me wrong, I could and did, push through most days but all it would take was a pin to drop and I was off and blubbering again. 

I'm not the worst at asking for help but I'm not the best either. 

Fortunately for us, people have been better at helping than I have been at asking. 

Dinner has been delivered every other night by an army of friends and neighbors. The kids have had transportation provided and extra play time at friend's houses so I could rest and my staff has been UNBELIEVABLE! 

Honestly, I couldn't ask for better employees! I want to go into detail about these women but I will save that for another day and give them the full post they deserve. 

Fast forward to this week and my drains were removed on Wednesday...finally. 

We arrived at the surgeon's office and checked in. 

The nurse (same one) came around the corner and told Glenn that he couldn't come in. I responded with another  massive meltdown...like snot bubble, hyperventilate meltdown. 

Persistent pain is exhausting. I was worn out and clearly incapable of controlling my emotions.

Fortunately she relented, let him come with me and my drains were removed. 

The left one was uncomfortable but the right (the one that's hurt the whole time) hurt like hell! The nurse had to stop halfway through removing it so I could take a break. 

She also removed the steri-strips from the surgery and it looks so good! The incision is still a little wrinkly but it's flattening out a little each day. 

I did apologize for being such a nut job in the waiting room. She told me it was ok and went on to explain that since she was in the room alone she was afraid of having my husband pass out (something that has happened with spouses before) and she would not be able to take care of him and pull the drains at the same time. 

She told me I didn't need to apologize but I did again anyway. I do feel badly. 

Without the drains in, both my demeaner and my range of motion are improving. I'm not crying at everything and I even helped on some of the cakes this week! 

Maybe I'll even be able to fold the massive pile of clean laundry that has accumulated in the house. 

Yippee. <snark>

Glenn washes and dries but doesn't fold. 

After lunch we met with my oncologist, Dr. Tedeschi at Penn Medicine. 

Before the doctor came in a technician came to take my weight, temp, oxygen level etc. then began asking the barrage of general questions. The best one was, "Are you experiencing pain?" Glenn snorted, I laughed and said, "I just had my drains removed, so today is probably not the day to ask." She looked at me like a deer in headlights and asked, "So you have pain?" I replied, "Yeah, yeah I have pain." 

Then she asked...

Wait for it...

...

"Where?"

"Where they cut my boobs off!" I snarked. 

Really?!

C'mon people! I understand that these are trained individuals but seriously, can we bring back common sense?! They are not just trained but over-trained an incapable or not allowed to think for themselves. 

It was like speaking with a robotic box-checker. 

The Oncologist was a different story! I really like her. She is smart, funny, compassionate and has common sense! 

She didn't brush my concerns aside about having two businesses and needing to be as available as possible. When discussing the chemo schedule and possible side effects she made the suggestion of Fridays for infusion. This way if I have a negative reaction to the chemo my down days would be Sunday and Monday when the store is closed anyway and I wouldn't have to worry about finding someone to cover my hours. If it goes well and I feel up to it, I can have the infusion in the morning and then work in the afternoon! 

If I don't have any reaction to the chemo, I can switch my infusion days to Tuesdays in Kennett Square vs Friday's in West Chester. The difference in drive time is about 25 minutes each direction so being able to move to Kennett Square would be fantastic! 

Dr. Tedeschi did say that I would probably lose my hair. I replied, "Well, a summer without shaving can't be all bad right?!" She looked me in the eyes, smiled and said, "I like you. We're going to get along really well." 

I know for some losing their hair can be very traumatic. Truth be told? I'm sort of looking forward to not having hair. I've had a life-long love/hate relationship with the stuff. It is extremely frizzy. I once even had a hairdresser refer to it as fuzzy! Not having to deal with it at all might be a welcomed change for a few months. 

Now onto the chemo regimen....

I will be having Taxol + Herceptin infused via a port once a week for 12 weeks and then just the Herceptin once every three weeks for the remainder of the year. 

Many people are familiar with the chemo cocktail of ACTH. This stands for chemotherapy medicines Adriamycin, Cytoxan (chemical name: cyclophosphamide), and Taxotere (chemical name: docetaxel), plus Herceptin.

ACT is much more harsh than just the Taxol and comes with so many more side effects. I am feeling very lucky. Studies have shown that, in patients with clear nodes and a mass less than 2 cm, there is no benefit in receiving the ACT with H and that Taxol plus Herceptin is just as effective. Had the mass been larger or the nodes hadn't been clear my treatment would be the ACTH. 

Chemo will start on June 25. 

When we walked through the door after the appointments on Wednesday the boys greated us with, "Did they take them out?" I pulled my shirt up to show them that the tubes were indeed gone. They both cheered enthusiastically and for the first time in almost two weeks I got to fully hug my kids. 

Something I hope to be doing for many, many, many years to come.